How to Set Motherhood Intentions to Grow as a Mom

Intentions get a bad rap, but purposeful living and personal growth are predicated on them. Here’s why you should set motherhood intentions and how you can use them to grow as a mom in the coming year.

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Intentions get a bad rap. Having “good intentions” has become synonymous with flakiness or lack of follow-through. And the phrase “setting intentions” has been co-opted by various new age and mystic circles.

But purposeful living and personal growth are predicated on intentions. And meaningful, continued, long-term success in any area requires them.

Including motherhood.

Here’s why you should set intentions for motherhood and how you can use them to grow as a mom in the coming year.

What is the difference between intentions and goals?

First, though, let’s briefly talk about the difference between intentions and goals.

Goals are:

Future-oriented
Specific and measurable
Focused on outcomes, achievements, and end results

Intentions, on the other hand, tend to be:

Present-oriented
Centered around a way of living or being, rather than an end result
More focused on relationships and processes

Neither is inherently good or bad. Neither is better than the other. We actually need both.

This may be overly simplistic, and I’m no expert, but I see intentions as the foundation and mold we use to shape our goals.

Without defined goals, our intentions usually remain mere good thoughts.

But without intentions, our goals easily end up arbitrary or off the mark. (The story comes to mind of the person who worked tirelessly to climb a ladder only to discover it was leaning against the wrong building.)

I like goals, I do. I believe in goals. But (and if you’re a hard-core goal person, this is going to bug the snot out of you) I don’t always like setting them.

Some things in life just aren’t measurable, and more than a few times, I have set completely arbitrary goals just for the sake of setting a goal.

And then I get discouraged and disgusted when I don’t meet them.

Also, setting goals (especially for motherhood) can be difficult in a season in which I don’t know what’s going to pop up throughout the day or week. Having rigidly-delineated goals often ends up making me inflexible and resentful of disruptions (even divine interruptions).

So, this year, I’ve decided I want to focus more on the process. Rather than having a lot of specific goals, I want to place more emphasis on setting intentions in motherhood and developing more purposeful habits.

Why Set Motherhood Intentions?

Setting intentions for motherhood:

Creates a clear picture of where you want to go and what you want to be as a mom
Makes you more purposeful in your day-to-day mothering
Builds a foundation for decision-making and how you craft your days
Roots you and grounds you in your values
Prevents the alternative of survival mode and aimless drifting

How to Follow Through With Your Intentions

But as we touched on earlier, we can’t stop here. For intentions to do us any good, we have to follow through with action.

And here’s where the rubber meets the road. This is where our plans and visions turn into reality. Where they have real effects on our mothering and turn us into the moms we were created to be.

So how do we follow through with our motherhood intentions? Here are 7 steps:

Have a vision
Set a clear vision for your mothering, using God’s Word as a foundation and supplementing with wise advisors and positive role models.
Find resources
Always be looking for resources to help you learn, including books, articles, blogs, magazines, podcasts, videos, sermons, social media accounts, mentors, conferences, etc.
Make a plan
Think of regular practices and activities that will help you fulfill your intentions.
Schedule your intentions
There is little chance you will follow through on your motherhood intentions unless you schedule the above plans into your day. If you wait to find the time, you never will.
Establish accountability
Find an accountability partner who will agree to check in with you and provide encouragement, advice, and loving correction if/when you need it.
Lean on God
If you feel like you can’t do this on your own, you’re right. God designed motherhood to be bigger than we can manage on our own because it requires us to pursue intimate relationship with Him. So lean on the Holy Spirit’s wisdom and power as you follow through with your motherhood intentions.
Give yourself grace
However, don’t forget to give yourself grace! You will never be a perfect mother. And that’s okay (good, even) because it leaves room for God to redeem your mistakes, fill in your gaps, and reveal your kids’ need for Him.

7 Motherhood Intentions I’m Setting This Year

To springboard your planning, here are some of my intentions for motherhood for the coming year, and a few corresponding practices:

Purposeful

I want my days to be filled with purpose and direction, not merely going through the motions or getting through the day.

Incorporate parenting goals and priorities into my weekly planning

Peaceful

I want my home and my parenting to be more characterized by peace and calm.

Start each day by filling myself with God’s Word and praying for the Holy Spirit to transform my heart

Loving

I want to build deep, loving relationships with each of my kids.

Make daily deposits in their “love banks”, especially in their preferred/strongest love languages
Pray for the Lord to help me control my tongue and restrain myself from speaking harshly or unkindly out of frustration or anger

Play/fun

I want to be a more playful and fun parent.

Make time for activities & games each week
Hold my plans with more open hands — be more flexible, taking advantage of opportunities for spontaneous fun

Present

I want to be a more present, less distracted mom

Designate more delineated “work” times
Have phone-free times throughout the day
Put the phone away while playing with the kids
Have more play times during the day and fewer things on my to-do list

Discipline

I want my discipline to be consistent, fair, calm, and motivated by a desire to raise them “in the training and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4)

Plan consequences so I’m more prepared
Wait to discipline until I’m calm and rational
Parent for the Lord and not for other people’s approval or good opinion

Training & Development

I want to supplement my kids’ academic education, nurture their spiritual development, and teach them practical life skills.

Continue our daily Bible reading and pray with them every day
Read to them daily (and have my reader read to me) and engage in other educational activities
Include them in meal preparation and other household tasks

Those are the intentions I’ve set for myself for my mothering in the next year. You might also consider intentions related to time management, organization, meal planning, healthy habits, physical activity, household systems, screen time, etc.

SHARE WITH US: If you’d like, feel free to share some of YOUR motherhood intentions for the coming year with us in the comments!