As wonderfully rich and rewarding as motherhood is, it can also be downright difficult. It demands a lot of us — mentally, emotionally, and physically. And some seasons are harder than others.
Then there are the days when we’ve struggled so long and so hard, we feel like we absolutely cannot go on. We’ve had enough. We cannot do this motherhood thing another day.
I know you know what I’m talking about. I think we’ve all been there. And to pretend as though we haven’t — as though we always love being a mom — doesn’t do ourselves or other moms any favors.
But although it’s normal and common, it’s not a place we want to remain for long. For the sake of our own hearts or the hearts of our children.
So when we feel that way — when we’re at our absolute wit’s end — we don’t want to ignore or repress that feeling. Rather, we should acknowledge it and implement some effective strategies to combat it.
Here are 10 practical things you can do when you feel like you’re going to lose your mind:
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10 PRACTICAL THINGS TO DO WHEN YOU’RE AT THE END OF YOUR ROPE
Pray for strength
One of the first and best things you can do when you feel like you’re going to lose it is to pray for strength. God cares for you and your children, and He will give you the strength you need.
Take a deep breath and calm yourself down
In the heat of the moment, when you feel like you’re going to lose your mind, break down, or explode, hit pause on the situation. Take a deep breath, count to 3 (or 10… or 100), and mentally will yourself to calm down. Replace the thoughts of “I’m going to lose it” with life-giving thoughts.
Sometimes it’s best to just walk away. If you have babies or toddlers, make sure they’re in a safe place, and then remove yourself from the area. Go to another room, shut the door, and take a minute or two (or longer, if possible) to calm down.
If you have older kids, you can even explain that you’re walking away to calm down — it will model a great anger/stress management technique!
Put down your projects
I have found that one of my biggest triggers for stress in motherhood is when I’m trying to do something and the kids are making it nearly impossible.
Sometimes the appropriate response is to teach them that I need to fulfill other responsibilities and find other activities to occupy them.
When that isn’t working, however, and things are turning ugly, the best strategy can sometimes be to simply put down my projects and give them my full attention.
Have a “fun” day
And if temporarily setting aside your projects isn’t enough, you might need to embrace a “fun” day. Set aside your to-do list, lower your standards for a day, and simply enjoy being present in the moment.
Play with your kids
We can also take a lesson from our kids and play! Embrace your inner child, get down on the floor, and play with your kids. Not only will it be good for your soul to enjoy yourself, but it will be good for your relationship with your kids, as well. You might just find your anger and frustration melting away and new life coming to your motherhood!
Spend some one-on-one time with your kids
I’ve also learned over the last year or so the incredible impact of one-on-one time with each of my kids. It does wonders for my kids’ love banks, meets their need for attention in positive ways so they don’t seek it in negative ways, and brings me joy, as well.
Focus on your blessings
You’ve probably heard it said that it’s hard to be grumpy when you’re grateful, and it’s so true. When you feel fed up, focus on your blessings. Try to turn each of your frustrations into something you can be grateful for.
Related Post: The Secret to Joyful Motherhood
Call/text a mommy friend
Another thing you can do when you’re at your wit’s end is to call or text another mom friend. We were never meant to mom alone, and sometimes the simple gift of understanding and solidarity is all we need to keep going. Be selective, however, in who you vent to and how you do it. Make sure your conversations are fueling your love and resolve, not your complaints and negativity.
There are a lot of things we can do to improve our attitudes, but sometimes what we really need is some time away to recharge and refuel. It’s been said, almost to the point of being trite, that we can’t pour from an empty vessel, and it is so so true. I’m always amazed at the difference in my mothering after I’ve taken some time to feed myself — physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
If you’ve been going through a prolonged period of joylessness or discontent in motherhood, or if you would simply like to enjoy your kids more, I have just the thing for you!
It’s a book called Love the Ones You’re With, and it’s a 30-day challenge that will help restore joy to your everyday motherhood, transform you from a tired, grumpy mom to a mom that’s fun to be around, and rejuvenate you for the journey of motherhood.
You can read more about the book and what others have said about it here.
- 5 Days to a More Joyful YOU!
- 10 Ways to Survive Tantrums (Without Losing Your Mind or Joy)
- The Secret to Joyful Motherhood (With FREE Printable!)
- Taming the Grocery Store Tantrums