From the moment we started talking about wanting another baby, people have freely offered their concerns and warnings:
“It’s a tough transition.”
“You’re going to be outnumbered.”
“You think you’re tired now…”
“It’s so hard.”
I’m sure none of these people are actually trying to talk us out of having another baby. (It’s too late now, anyway!) They’re probably just trying to give a friendly warning about what’s to come. Or maybe they’re simply making conversation. I don’t know.
But here’s my response to the warnings about how hard it’s going to be:
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My Response to the Warnings About Three Kids
I get it.
I understand it’s going to be hard. I mean… I don’t really understand yet in the way that you can never really understand things until you’ve experienced them. (Like how I didn’t really understand how hard the first baby was going to be or how hard adding the second child would be.)
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But I get that it’s going to be hard.
I’m under no misapprehension that this is going to be a walk in the park. Believe me. It’s actually something I think about all the time.
I worry about how we’re going to take care of everyone when we’re outnumbered.
I worry about how I’m going to wrangle more kids than I have hands.
I worry about how I will adjust to the new routine of three children.
I worry about the effects it will have on my sanity.
I worry that I won’t be able to handle it.
I worry about all these things. So, believe me when I say I didn’t make this decision lightly.
How I Knew We Weren’t “Done”
Even though I know it’s going to be hard, even though I doubt my abilities as a mom, even though I question whether I’m the type of mom that can handle more than two kids (sometimes I question whether I can handle two!), I’m sure of one thing.
There is a desire — a stirring, really — in my heart to have more children and raise them for the Lord. And I know it’s not from me.
How do I know that?
Because there was a time, as I have often shared on The Merry Momma, when I wasn’t even sure I wanted to have kids.
But God eventually gave me a vision for motherhood (or, rather, I finally listened!), and I’ve never been the same since. That’s how I know this is a calling from God and not a personal whim.
And you know what most (actually, I’m 99% sure it’s all) callings from God have in common?
They involve doing hard things.
They stretch us outside our comfort zones. They require strength and abilities beyond what we naturally possess. They lead other people to ask whether we know what we’re doing. They lead us to ask ourselves whether we know what we’re doing.
But difficulty has never been a reason to shy away from things God is calling us to do. Being unsure of ourselves and our resources hasn’t either. Because whatever He calls us to do, He enables us to do.
Related Post: I Said I Would Never … But God Had Other Plans
ALERT ALERT! Before I say one more word, however, let me be perfectly clear — I am not suggesting that every family is supposed to have lots of kids. God’s plans are as diverse as they are perfect, and we cannot (and should not) dictate what is “right” for any family other than our own.
I’m only speaking for myself here. And I knew I wasn’t done after two.
Not because I thought it would be fun to have another baby. Certainly not because I’m naturally gifted at being a mother! But because this third baby was something God placed in my heart. I knew it was something I was supposed to do.
Even though I knew it was going to be hard.
MY ENCOURAGEMENT TO YOU
So, let me leave you with this final encouragement:
If there is something you feel in your heart God is calling you to do — whether that’s having another baby or starting a business or pursuing a goal — but you’re scared that it might be too hard…
Do it anyway.
Because the best things from God usually are.
- I Said I Would Never … But God Had Other Plans
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