How to Love Your Season of Motherhood

Whether you’re struggling in your current stage of parenting, or you simply want all the joy it has to give, here are 7 ways to love your season of motherhood.

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In Iowa, where I live, we have four very distinct seasons. Winter is vastly different from spring, which is different from summer, which is different from fall. Each season has its own unique trials and pleasures. And while I definitely have a favorite (spring, in case you’re dying to know), I try to enjoy them all. Even winter… though that’s still a work in progress. 😉

Just as in our calendar year, motherhood also comes in a series of seasons, each with its own particular challenges and joys. And some can be more of a struggle than others.

For some moms, it’s the infant stage (especially if you have a fussy baby – or three – like I did). For others it’s the age when they learn to talk back. For many, it’s the turbulent teen years.

While I haven’t been through all the stages of parenting myself, I firmly believe that the more we embrace our present, rather than pining for the past or fixating on the future, the more we will live full of contentment and joy.

Wishing for our babies back or longing for an empty nest – both will rob us of the joys to be found right where we are.

Every season has its particular challenges, yes. Some more than others, depending on our experiences and personalities. But every season has something to love, as well.

Whether you’re struggling in your current stage of parenting, or you simply want all the joy it has to give, here are 7 ways to love your season of motherhood.

Why Should I Embrace Every Season?

Before we dive into that, though, let me quickly answer a question you may be asking: “Why do I have to love my season?” Some seasons are just plain hard. Isn’t it ok to not like it and just muscle through?

I mean… you definitely can, if you want. But here are a few reasons I, personally, have decided to try to embrace every season:

Kids can tell
Our kids can tell when we are not enjoying motherhood. Even if we don’t say it, they can pick it up in our tone, our attitude, and our nonverbal communication. And that can leave an indelible mark on their hearts and affect our long-term relationships with them.
To live a joy-filled life
I want to cultivate joy in my life – inside motherhood and out, in every season. I don’t want to put it off until an “easier” stage of parenting (that may or may not even come). I want to have joy now. That doesn’t mean certain seasons won’t be hard, but hard doesn’t have to be bad. We can still have joy in the hard.
To steward it well
Embracing each stage of motherhood helps us steward it faithfully. When we dread, complain about, or try to “just survive” a season, we will not be intentional about looking for and capitalizing on its opportunities. We have a finite number of years to raise our children; I want to make the most of every single one of them.
It helps us persevere
Finally, embracing a particularly difficult season of motherhood helps us persevere. Finding the joys gives us strength in the challenges. Delighting in it gets us through the discouragement. Motherhood IS hard, but finding ways to love each season will keep us diligent and purposeful through them all.

7 Ways to Love Your Season of Motherhood

From the reasons above, we can see that embracing each stage of motherhood is important. But boy, is it hard sometimes, right?? No matter what you find yourself facing right now, here are 7 ways to love your current season of motherhood.

1. Get perspective

The first thing to do is recognize that it is a season, and that seasons change. What you are experiencing now will not always be.

Knowing it won’t last forever, acknowledge what this season is and what it is not. Winter is not the time to cultivate my garden, but spring and summer are ideal. Summer is much too busy (and beautiful) to hunker down inside with cups of steaming coffee, but the snowy days of winter are my perfect excuse.

In the same way, not all things are meant for all seasons of motherhood. Know your priorities, have realistic expectations, and cultivate the right things for this particular season.

2. Look for the good

Every season of motherhood has something to love. It may not feel like it, but it’s there. And when we are intentional about looking for the good, we will find it. Not only that, but the more we practice looking for the joys in our season of motherhood, the more of them we will find to enjoy. It’s a snowball effect we have to initiate by finding the first flake.

3. See the value in the struggle

Not only can we look for the good in our season, we can also look for the gain. Over the last several months, I’ve adopted the mantra (for lack of a better word), “Hard isn’t bad,” and it has been a complete paradigm shift for me. Rather than viewing struggle as a reason not to enjoy something (as I used to), I now look for the ways I will learn and grow from it.

Motherhood is sanctifying. Like nothing else in my life, raising my kids through various ages and stages has pruned, stretched, sanded, and conformed me into the image of Christ. And while it may not exactly be fun in the process, knowing what the results will be – progressive Christ-likeness – brings me tremendous joy.

4. Surround yourself with positive moms

If you want to love your season of motherhood, surround yourself with moms who love theirs. By and large, we tend to adopt the attitudes of the people around us. When we hang out with moms who constantly complain about their kids (or mothering, in general), we will likely feel a downward pull on our own attitude. The good news is, the opposite can also be true – spending time with moms who speak positively about their parenting will often bolster your own.

5. Ask for ideas

On that note, when you find those positive, joyful moms, ask them what they love(d) about your stage of motherhood. The details of your situations might be different, but it can still inspire you to find the good (see #2). If they’re further down the road in their parenting journey, ask them what they love about their current season. Tuck those tidbits away for future reference!

6. Take care of yourself

It’s difficult to be a joyful mom when your strength and energy are depleted. One practical way to infuse more joy into your season of motherhood, then, is to take care of your needs. Care for yourself physically (exercising, fueling your body with good food, and getting adequate sleep), but also mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. All are important aspects of our health, and all contribute to how well we can embrace our season of motherhood.

7. Invite God’s help

My last (but certainly not least) piece of advice is to seek God’s help. God blessed you with these children. He wants you to embrace the role He’s given you. And He wants you to enjoy the process. So, ask Him to help you do it.

Be honest with Him about your struggles. (He knows them, anyway.) Ask Him to open your eyes to the good in your season. Ask Him to give you a fresh perspective. Ask Him to put other moms in your life who will encourage you. Ask Him to infuse you with fresh strength and joy. He will do it, and He’ll do it like nothing else can.

Just as winter here in Iowa will turn to spring in a few (blessed!) weeks, so, too, will our seasons of motherhood inevitably change. Each stage of parenthood is different from the one before or after it, and some are naturally easier than others. But I firmly believe that each one can be embraced with peace, joy, and intention, and I hope the tips above help you love the season you’re in.

Cultivate Joy in Motherhood

Was this post helpful? Much of it comes from my latest book, The Merry Momma Manual.

The Merry Momma Manual is a clarion call to pursue joyful motherhood. Through inspiration, encouragement, and practical help, it will guide you as you put effective strategies for cultivating joy into practice. Above all, its purpose is to encourage and equip you to enjoy this incredible, challenging, important role.

And I hope by the end, you will not only believe it’s possible to have joy in every season of motherhood, you will feel empowered to make it true for you.

Learn more here