It’s no secret I love reading books for moms. I love learning from moms, reading about their experiences, and knowing that other women out there “get” me. They make me feel part of a community, even though I’ve never met them and probably never will.
So, I’ve read a lot of different “mom” books. They’re all slightly different in their own unique spins and views and stories, but there’s also a lot of the same kind of stuff.
I just finished reading one, though, that was different from any I’ve read before. It was about how to make motherhood “easier, richer, and more fun than you ever imagined” by banding together and making motherhood a group effort.
The book was Better Together: Because You’re Not Meant to Mom Alone, by Jill Savage, and I LOVED it! As I was reading, it quickly made the list of one of my favorite books for moms. Let me tell you why…
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What’s Better Together All About?
Better Together is a book about the power of community. It was written by Jill Savage, founder of Hearts at Home, with input from her daughter Anne. It is peppered throughout with short anecdotes from moms across the county. It also includes several helpful appendices, including conversation starters, a personality assessment, and a guide for a small group study.
The book teaches moms about the value of forming bonds with other mothers, explains different mom personalities and how we can all work together, and offers lots of practical ways that women can help, support, and encourage each other.
The premise of the book is that none of us can do motherhood on our own, but too many of us try. We view asking for help as a sign of weakness, and we think doing it all on our own makes us better moms.
But Jill & Anne show us that this was not the way God designed motherhood to be. You and I are actually better moms when we travel the road of life and motherhood together.
I’ll admit, I’m a mom who isolates herself too often. I’m mostly extroverted, and I love being around people, but I can also easily get wrapped up in my own life. My own to-do’s, my own family needs, my own schedule. And I don’t often make the effort that forming close friendships requires. It’s sad but true.
On top of that, I tend to be like the moms Jill describes who let “insecurities and assumptions keep us from engaging in each other’s lives.” A lot of the fears she listed in the book resonated with me, but none more greatly than the fear that asking for help means I’ve failed as a mom. I often turn down an offer of help, or even the opportunity to share something I’m struggling with because I’m afraid of what other people will think of me. I’m afraid to admit that I can’t do it on my own because it appears to me that the other “good moms” I know can.
But as Jill reminds us in the book, we make unfair comparisons when we only look at what we see on social media or how families appear in occasional social settings. As she says, “We’re comparing their highlight reels to our behind-the-scenes reels.” That was a good reminder to me that we’re all human! None of us are perfect, none of us know everything, and none of us can “do it all!”
We’re comparing their highlight reels to our behind-the-scene reels.
I was deeply inspired by her introductory chapters where she explained why we need each other, but I got the most out of the chapters explaining how to grow meaningful friendships.
This is where much of the book settled, and it was full of great ideas for connection, fellowship, and meeting real needs. She not only provided ideas of where to meet other moms and how to develop deeper bonds, but also how to learn from each other, share with each other, and help each other in more meaningful ways.
Better Together was a great book for all moms to remind us we’re not meant to go at it alone. We work better when we work together. And it’s a valuable resource that will teach you practical ways to be a good friend when you’re not sure what to do or where to start.
If you’ve ever had trouble making friends or keeping friends, or even if you just want to learn how to be a better friend, I highly recommend this book! You will be a better friend AND mom by the end. I know I’m a different woman for having read it, and I’m excited to put some of her tips into practice!
More book reviews:
- Mother & Son: The Respect Effect
- Hands Free Mama
- The SuperMom Myth
- Say Goodbye to Survival Mode
- Keep It Shut